Saturday, January 7, 2012

HELP!

I've got a little problem trying to make sure what I've said about the relationships between people in my WIP sounds right. But I need to have any of you to read this through and tell me if it makes sense.

Before I do that I have to explain that the characters in this (aside from Sabrina, who is human), are vampires who marry human women and have off-spring. Thus, when a wife dies, another will take her place, or a lover, whatever.

Here in this scene I have Sabrina and Drachen. Drachen is explaining how he is related to his cousins, Jett and Joha.

FYI: Gretchen is Jett and Joha's mother. Their father is Drakulya--who is hundreds of years old, and is now married to Gretchen.

Drachen's sister's name is Ali. Their father's name is Mehnea.

Got it? This is very complicated, and so it won't surprise me if you're all itching your head right now. But here goes...

SABRINA: "...I see that Mihnea was your father. Sixty-five years ago Mihnea was born to Drakulya, and he eventually married Ivory who died. He then married Contessa, and they had children. But you and Ali are his youngest children...? Somehow that doesn't sound right."

DRACHEN: "Actually it's a bit more complicated. We are half brother and sister to Jett and Joha, and we are also their aunt and uncle."

SABRINA: "You're right. That is complicated."

DRACHEN: "Mihnea, our father, became a vampire much like I am becoming one at about the same age. Contessa is Gretchen's sister who he married after Ivory died at age eighty-three. Gretchen, being Jett and Joha's mother, made us more than merely cousins."


Okay, if anyone out there is still confused, let me know. If I don't get this right I may have to simply chuck it.

Thanks in advance!

2 comments:

  1. This sounds like the "19 Children & Counting" show - LOL. Imagine Jim Bob trying to one day explain how they are all related - aunt and uncles being the same age as their counsins, etc.

    Anyhoo I think this makes sense. I'll just have to suspend my belief unless I decide to draw diagrams...

    Hope this helps

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, drawing diagrams... maybe I should have done this. But it was more the wording of it. Even as I wrote this out (using the mss. to go by, I saw errors, and corrected them as I went. Sometimes--and you might want to use this--when you re-write something you see the problems. Also they say to read it out loud to find mistakes, but this one was tough.

    Thanks, Dora. Your belief system sounds just fine to me!LOL!

    ReplyDelete

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